Thursday, April 12, 2012

Derby and Friends

Congratulations on becoming a roller girl! Or maybe you've been around a while. Still, this is an issue. Your friends (or sig os) ask you to hang out and you reply, "I"m sorry, I've got derby." They roll their eyes. You feel awful.

This is a common problem. Some have gone so far as to say that skaters are in a relationship with derby. In my limited time on the track, I've seen skaters retire because derby ate up too much of their time. Their friends never saw them anymore.

This doesn't have to be the case. You can have your friends and eat them...wait, that's not right. You can have your friends and your derby. That's better.

Remember that you will gain a whole new group of friends when you start playing roller derby. And that they DO NOT have to be friends with your non-derby friends. Rollergirls are a special sort. Not everyone is comfortable with sweaty ladies who burp and show off bruises in public. This is a generalization, but rollergirls are a different breed. So just because your friends don't want to hang out with your teammates does not mean you have to give them up.

Also, leagues typically host/attend events that are out in the community. My league has participated in Pride events, "blood wrestling," events at bars, charity work...so on and so forth. This might be a chance for your friends to meet your teammates in a less intimidating sort of environment. They might see the glimmer and y'all have and decide to strap on skates themselves or volunteer.

And of course, invite your friends to bouts. I have to sell tickets to our home bouts, and I'm always hitting up my friends. This seems to be easier when you first start because your friends are less sick of hearing about derby. You may even be able to ask your Bout Production head if you could watch a game instead of volunteering. I still have not taken advantage of this option, because I'm crazy busy on bout days.

And if your friends are unable to cope with the awesome superheroine you are becoming, it might be time to get new friends. If they can't support you, you should rethink the relationship.

But if your friends accept what you're doing, and respect derby, it is possible to keep them in your lives. They may still roll your eyes when you talk about it, but they'll have some idea what Ellen Page is talking about around 1:50 in the trailer. Because love of this sport is why we do it.

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